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On May 17th, I had posted the following on Facebook:
I am done.
I am done allowing the enemy lie to me and keep me hidden in fear and rejection.
I am done allowing who others are (good or bad) determine who I am, and bringing me into misery without joy! Ugh!
I stopped posting anything personal on Facebook because I felt it gave false connection. Which it may of course. But I am a connector! Lol. I love to network. I love to share me and my life and hear about others.
So if you care
Who I am:
- I LOVE talking about YOU and your heart! I thrive on inspiring others! I know this makes some people uncomfortable and I am becoming okay with that. I am learning that not everyone is to be that intimate with me & nor me with them. And I am okay if we aren’t close friends like that.
- I LOVE quality time. It is a need I have and it is NOT one I created, but God. I have amazing people that will make time and hang with me and again I am becoming okay now with those that don’t. (As I use to think everyone should be my hangout friend. where would that time be?!? Haha) [[this one is still challenging for me with Community but I am learning HIS WAYS in this. *Share if you have any input!]]
- I LOVE chatting about Kingdom. Again this is usually your heart. So if that’s a ministry, Family or health, then that’s what I ask about. To know you, inspire you and connect with you. It’s who I am. Family is a new one for me but now I get it. Haha
- I LOVE to empower people. So when some weakness is shared with me I look for opportunities to inspire the opposite. No I don’t always do this right, nor should I say anything at times or have the right timing but again I am okay with that. It’s my journey and I am growing & learning always! If I do this incorrectly to you. Tell me! Help me grow!
- to my leaders. Yes I am that one that confesses all my weaknesses to you. I get it out. I haven’t always done Perfect with this but it has always set me free quicker! My poor leaders. Haha This has been my first season without a mentor and it’s been so challenging. Anything evil hidden is aweful and I want no part of it! ((Anger? I tell someone, my first time drunk as a believer (on purpose) I told three of my pastors. Lol. And they gracefully encouraged me to only share with one for accountability; no worries this was back in 2015, Evil motives towards my husband, I tell him (hasn’t always gone well haha) or another woman for correction lol)) *yes I know I can go to Jesus. And I do. It’s the ones I need to be expose that get shared*
- I have always been in leadership since I got saved in 2004. Until last year October 2017. I may share too much of my opinion. Lol. I am working on keeping this mouth shut more!. I do feel God puts the right people and their opinion in the right place. (Also called leaders :)) so I don’t have to share mine! Haha go figure!
- I am a mom but it has not always been my dream. It’s been a very hard road to surrender to, but I am. And I am gaining more and more joy in it. Of course Cayden is just amazing!
-sometimes I get my encouragement mixed with “fixing” someone. It’s not always Gods will for me to fix obviously! HA!
-I have had a life of digestive issues that are just plain aggravating. When I was born I had an infection in my blood that put me on two weeks of antibiotics. Saved my life but tore up my system. So this is why I share about food and health on Facebook often and may ask you about your health. Haha
I do apologize though for anyone that has been offended or hurt by my abrasive desire for you to be whole, my growth & learning curves! :-)
And yes these may change and there may be imperfect thinking and I am okay with that. As I am open to being corrected always, changing, growing, etc. I love it!
And PS. I really do love hearing the opposite of my opinion. I love getting to the why and how and knowing the truth.
AND yes we can still hang if you don’t like some of the above. As I will always be open and ask do you want an opinion, encouragement, or what’s best to chat about. Lol. I have learned this thank God! As again I love to EMPOWER YOU!
Okay. That’s all. I may or may not start posting personal life on Facebook again. We shall see :-)""""""""""""""
I posted this mostly for myself. I had to make it known to myself and make a decision that I was not going to stay where I was. Man what a difference it has made. It was the beginning of my breakthrough and leaving the "wilderness". Below, I share what I was breaking out of. In hope to encourage or help someone who may be in the same boat.
"When God sends you it may not be where you were prepping to go"
Back in October of 2017, The Lord decided it was time for me to step out of serving others visions, in ministry, after 13 years. It was really all I knew in “serving” the kingdom since I was saved in 2004. God saying this, was not at all what I was expecting! And at the same time He surprisingly blessed us with another gift, Baby Greer #2. So the emotions with hormones were crazy! LOL
So with these two major changes I was a basket case. I dealt with so many lies and even suicidal thoughts. It sucked! I would dig myself out of the emotional hole for a few moments and then fall back in. It was hard for me to be around my normal peeps. It just depressed me more. I felt forsaken, lost and sad. The biggest thing that kept coming at me was "I was forsaken. My dreams, desires, efforts, hopes, all of it, forsaken."
I HAD to reach out consistently to people I could trust for truth. I knew some of the things I was dealing with wasn’t right but it WAS SO REAL! ***please don’t just negate your emotions when they get this deep and dark, SAY SOMETHING!! Get help! And have those around you to speak truth to you constantly until you're through.***
I knew that God was the one asking me to make this change, so he was of course to blame. Lol God also said my relationships would change, so I couldn’t get mad at people for that either. I was so stuck and no one to blame "in person" but God! GAAAHH!
"Journaling all your dreams and prophetic words. It may be the answer you are looking for 6 months from now!"
Of course the Lord did prep me; as He is faithful! But I missed all the "clues" he gave before this all started. As I looked back to read my journals (which he told me to read my 13 years worth of journaling at the same time) it reminded me of His faithfulness and showed me He had given me dreams personally and prophetic words from people not involved with any of this to help me through what was coming.
Here are some of the encounters, revelations and words He gave me within 6 months before my transition started:
- I noticed in May of 2017 the Lord had started speaking to me about restoring the inheritance of my generations past and for my generations to come. He had confirmed it when I opened up this book by Shawn Bolz “Keys to Heavens Economy”, and his first chapter read Restoring Desolate Inheritances. This book awakened it more in me! I actually bought the book almost a year before for a reason I didn't know and began reading it now.
- He gave me Psalms 37 out of the blue and it is all about the Lord will not forsake you. At the time, I wasn't sure how much I would need these verses. So this was a Word I had to mull on. You know sometimes you get a word and it’s an instant filling in your spirit but others it’s like chewing a big thick steak that's been burnt on the outside! Lol Also forsaken is like a curse word to me and I don't want anything to do with it. So to think I would actually need this scripture and feel forsaken was awful!
- At the same time of revelation with my inheritance being restored, He began speaking to me about my calling/grace as a prophet in May. Out of the blue. It’s not something I focused on throughout my walk because of always serving others visions but it was neat how He brought it all up. Even reviewing my journals and showing me where I had been given this revelation of my calling multiple times and just put it on the shelf until “time”. So I began dreaming with God in this! Of course in my way of how it would come about :)
- July of 2017, He took me to a new place in the spirit to reveal things to me. It was a cave. I thought "neat", how fun and how many treasures do we find in caves! :) But within the hour Brian Simmons started his teaching about David and how he had his season in the cave. GAAAAHHHHH! I quickly wiped that away because I didn't want to hear it. The cave meant no connection or recognition (acceptance so I thought it was at the time) and man I needed both so I thought. Brian also grabbed the mic while I was in my encounter and began speaking about relationships and such which I knew was for me. But I again, didn't put much attention to it at the time because I didn't want any of my relationships to change.
- a friend of a friend had prayed for me one week (as we asked him to for a word) and left me a voicemail with a word he felt impressed from the Lord. Every single thing he shared pointed to this time. He gave the word early spring of 2017 though, so I wasn't sure of parts of the word. So as I was reading my journals I listened to the word again and BAM it hit my spirit hard in November of 2017 after all this started :) Was soooo encouraging and refreshing to know that God was actually in all this!
"So here I am now"
So now after these 6 months of prepping me with the words, revelation and encouragement above, it was time for alignment. Usually when alignment happens it is taken as exciting and running into your dreams. But not this time, so it seemed. My dreams have always been serving the body of Christ and impacting nations. These dreams I didn't chase but God very clearly has given to me through many confirmations throughout the past 13 years.
So His alignment was me stepping out of everything. Was me letting go of everything I had my hands to and heart. Again, I was not prepping for this. I was prepping to be sold out and in connection FULLY with those around me and the ministry I was serving. So a big shock to my system this was!
Part of this alignment was accepting my place and calling as a mom and prophet to my family. The Greer Tribe. My dream of family, kids, mom and such was brand new. Really implanted by God. Not made up by me. I believe there were reasons why I didn't dream this, like not having a father figure in my childhood that was able to be there for me, having physical and sexual abuse as a kid and making bad choices as a teenager. The dreaming of my own family was dim. So it needed to be cultivated in me.
Another part of this alignment is me letting go of my WAY that my dreams would come about. As someone preached recently, the prophetic words we have don't always include directions and steps. So I had to lay down all my dreaming and thoughts on how they may be coming about. Trusting God with all that HE had given me.
So here I am. Finally having breakthrough with stopping all lies from feeding me any longer. I am not missing out. I am not less than. I am being pruned and prepped daily to be more like Him and more like ME :) I am still on my path to completing my destiny on bringing heaven to earth and I am so honored I get to be a prophet to my family! We shall overcome and we shall have the fullness of His mysteries and the GREER TRIBE WILL HELP RESTORE THIS WORLD!
This blog is written in hopes to inspire you to be an amazing YOU! To be real, honest, loving and kind. First to YOURSELF and then to others!